Jane Ray
Sunday, January 10, 2016
real talk//real life
Sunday, January 3, 2016
long walks and junnie b jones.
I remember every Halloween with the black tube slide and the alarm at the back door.
I remember the day my first dog died, I didn't fill in a single bubble on the sheet of my second grade end of the year test i was so distraught.
and i still remember the first time i lied to my parents.
I remember the first concert i went to. My sister brought her boyfriend, and there was smoke in the air. That boy is now her husband.
I remember my first trip to Oregon.
I remember meeting my best friend. We have been friends for 10 years.
I remember the first time i swore at my mom.
I remember the day i became an aunt.
I remember walking home from school because my mom forgot to pick me up.
and i still remember how scared i was of tornadoes and being kidnapped.
I remember November 2nd at 12:57 and leaving Sunday school in the middle of the prayer to find my mom through blurred eyes. And 5 days later when i knew that would be the last time i would ever see him, and crying while singing.
I remember when my mom told me i was getting a little brother, turns out i actually got a little sister.
I remember when i was so eager to graduate. im not so sure anymore.
I remember the first time i saw my dad cry, i was sitting on the floor by my fireplace.
I remember having glasses and braces, it made me very insecure.
I remember my 10th birthday.
I remember when my backyard was just dirt.
I remember getting pulled over with my grandma on my 12th birthday.
I remember selling lemonade on my front lawn for a week straight. i made $9.75.
I remember the last time i cried.
and i still remember reading junnie b jones in my carseat in front of the stairs in my family room.
i remember,
i remember it all, even if i don't always want to.
Sunday, December 13, 2015
The Broken Teen
I have had a crush on you since sophmore year and thats how i became a broken girl. I was once white and full of goodness and innocence, when you came along. We got to know each other and the sound of one anothers car motors and the way the other wrote y=mx+b. You then promised me forever and i thought you and i would end never. It lasted as long as your average froot by the foot and i was ok, because i knew that someday i would become to old for your company. More often than not, i now feel disoriented and uneasy, but that wont hold me back because i will be different now.
Now socializing gives me anxiety & my dad asks me if i own any cloths in color. But i still love the sound of my mothers laugh and the conversations we had without words. And i could still recognize your car motor in seconds and your beautiful brown eyes still on occasion make me cry. But thank you for being you because it has helped me become me.
I hope you enjoy this Kellie, and enjoy the way i used your words. Keep writing because it is
truly amazing and very heart felt.
Sunday, December 6, 2015
Book of Love.
Sunday, November 29, 2015
Sunday, November 22, 2015
The songs i don't tell anyone else about.
From the Bottom of my Heart//Mury
Tell Me I'm A Wreck//Every Avenue
Forever and Always//Parachute
Sleep Sweet//Mury
Goodnight Moon//Go Radio
Skinny Love//Birdy
Dance Floor Anthem//Good Charlotte
You Are Gold//The National Parks
Somebody That I Used to Know//Mayday Parade
Coffins//MisterWives
Stressed Out//Twenty One Pilots
Take You Away//The National Parks
Angel With A Shotgun//The Cab
Go to Hell//Go Radio
Aint No Rest For the Wicked// Cage the Elephant
The Great Escape//Boys Like Girls
Somewhere in Neverland//All Time Low
Mockingbird//Eminem
CheaterCheaterBestFriendEater//Never Shout Never
No Surprise//Daughtry
Only Love Can Hurt Like This//Paloma Faith
The Breakup Song//Runner Runner
Endlessly//The Cab
It's Up To You//Walk the Moon
Toxic Valentine//All Time Low
Terrible Things//Mayday Parade
Sunday, November 15, 2015
A love of social frenzy.
Our love changed faster than the leaves in the fall and fell faster than them all. With the black seats of your truck they ripped right through my heart. And we watched fireworks in the summer because I loved them, and saw movies that I didn't really want to see. My love for country fell from my heart because you said that wasn't allowed, and you grew to love the band's that I believed were all mine. I grew to know the stories of your home thanks to your mom, and you never opened up like that. The oxygen that we took in turned from being clear to something that we wished we never would have had to see. That changed to me playing country music because I knew that you would roll your eyes and say that it gives you the hives, and you stating that you hate fireworks because you wanted to give me water works.
Then you took my heart.
You said it was shit, and ripped it up and took thousands of hits.
We fell from a tree, that love of you and me, and became worse than a social frenzy.